Live in Light

"Take 45 minutes and give yourself a solo retreat.  See what you notice then come back and share". This was part of a Saturday morning inservice training exploring among other things, the impact our connection with nature has on all aspects of our life.  

I knew where I was heading - straight to an amazing tree in the park.  I've run past this tree hundreds of times on my runs in Pukekura park and I love it. 

With an intention of complete presence, I made my way slowly to the tree. Even though the clouds were threatening to burst and the air chilly I passed many families playing in the park.  Then as I neared the bush, I started to feel a difference on my skin. Almost as if the atmosphere was changing.  

As I shifted my presence from the bubbles of joy of children playing in autumn leaves to the bush.  It was as if I was entering a parallel version of the path I have wandered along for years.  I could feel and "see" energy shifting...

My mum's a pretty out there, adventurous 82 year old.  In the last 5 years she's taken herself on trips around the world, had cancer and recovered, moved home, met a new partner, remarried . She's pretty awesome.

But computers were one aspect that almost had her beat.   Lockdown Zoom calls were just not working.  Frustration, self talk along the what am I doing wrong, was going round in circles until I realised her computer was too old.

Enter a new device (my old iPad)  and a whole new way of doing things. Including having to set it up remotely.  With a step by step guide I created handed over the fence along with the ipad (social distancing meant I couldn't be there to help), I was super proud of mum for stepping up, grabbing her courage and running with it.  And delighted with a lovely long chat and shared cuppa via Zoom once it was up and running.

So why am I sharing this?

Because quite possibly you have something that feels hard for you yet seems...

In a very short time our global way of living has changed.  It's as if a whirlpool just stopped and the water is working out where to go.   Lives, routines and ways of interacting have changed.  

How do you navigate through this?   How do you find space and a way through when that voice of uncertainty  wakes you in the wee hours?    When the tiredness and stress plays out with snappiness at children, partners, friends or self?    When your self sabotage kicks in and it's harder to care for yourself? 

The underlying feelings can sit hidden in your body, affecting your health without you necessarily knowing.   This virus is giving you a huge invitation to recognise and release old patterns.   Individually and collectively. 

In the general busyness of life (before Covid-19)  you possibly spent only part of your day with family and / or self.  Busy rushing from place to place, meeting to meeting, doing...

"The day you stop learning is the day you die" was a really common phrase in my house as I was growing up.  

I love the subtext of it.  

• The recognition that we are all learners in life.  
• There's no point in looking for perfection 'cause there's always more to discover and ways to evolve.  
• Look for and surround yourself with people who can help you grow.  
• Be gentle with yourself on your journey.  
• It's ok to take baby steps.  
• Keep a learners mindset.
• Share what you have learned to support others on their journey.

There have been times when I've forgotten the inherent wisdom in this.  I've held myself back looking for perfection.  I've forgotten to allow myself time for baby steps.  But generally I've embraced the opportunity to learn.  

I love having a supportive community to support growth.  While I have taken lots of online courses now, the ones I find myself getting more from and more likely to complete and...

It's an interesting experience to look back over a decade.

As I'm gearing up to start Practice Sessions for 2020 I decided to see how many workshops I've taught.   63.  

Thats sixty three opportunities for people to grow,  to impact amazingly on our community.   To stretch.  To evolve.  To touch our world with Love.

It's also sixty three times I've stepped up,  held space for others.   And evolved with how to lead transformational change.

70 Practice Sessions.  Times for people who have been on these workshops to come together,  expand,  gain confidence,  enhance,  grow,  revise.   Seventy sessions exploring topics that arise,  topical issues from a different perspective;   opportunities to transform our world with love with techniques that can be used individually,  with family,  clients,  our community.

Numerous sessions with extraordinary people.   I haven't even counted...

Today I had a tech problem.  I was sure it was pretty basic, but I had no idea how to resolve it.  Actually I'd had the same problem before, back then I ignored it, hoped it would go away. It didn't.  

Today I made the same mistake and got the same result.  Glitch.  The edit button had disappeared on something I was writing.  And trust me, being able to (spell check, rewrite, add a few words here and there) is really handy.  

Today I decided to do something different.   I asked for help.    I got it within 30 seconds.  All I needed to do was convert to full screen and the edit button was there.  Really simple in retrospect.    I also discovered a few shortcuts that will make things easier in the future.   And I got to chat to the lovely service man who helped.  

 I realised that by avoiding asking for help last time it had cost me  - time, effort, ease, connection.  It made things harder...

Last night was bookclub night.  I love these nights.  Wonderful friends, deep conversation with the occasional talk about books thrown in.  Which is pretty handy given that one of the women is an author.

It was our first meeting for the year (and new decade), we reflected on how we had grown over the last 10 years.  It was pretty exciting for us all to see.  Given that "the author" was one of the first people to encourage me to write, I got to see first hand how much of the past decade I had spent resisting.  It was quite a revelation to realise how much.

The bundles of energy compressed in my neutrons and pathways felt enormous.   The years of old programming and beliefs that I had held onto to:   keep small, keep my ideas to myself, to hold onto the belief I couldn't write.  

It's interesting to see the effect as I decided to step up this year.  To stretch beyond and release these bundles of compressed energy.  I'm spending...

My younger son flew out on his school exchange today.  Thirteen students and their incredible teachers heading off to immerse themselves in a different language and culture.  I'm  grateful to our global community who see the value in supporting our young people to learn and grow. They create opportunities that make a difference.

The wider community have been supporting this trip for over a year now.   It's  humbling seeing the number of people come to sausage sizzles and quiz nights to support fund raising.  Many people share their own experiences of an exchange or of high school.

Even the bank tellers as we exchanged currency this week were encouraging of him and the opportunities awaiting him.  Their pearls of wisdom have flowed and been well received.

So this morning, bags packed we headed to the airport to say farewell.  And we waited as fog delayed then cancelled their flight.  Numerous flights.  It soon became obvious that...

In my part of our planet (earth paradise) it's coming to the end of the summer school holidays.   One of the decisions I made years ago, was to have the school holidays off work.   I wanted adventures, memories and time with my boys.  So I've been enjoying an extended holiday.

As they're gearing up to go on their next life adventures (university and school exchange), I'm so glad I made that decision.   It's enabled lots of those delicious holiday days playing games, doing outdoor adventures and other spontaneous things.

A few weeks ago, one of my mentors suggested doing a 21 day Love Fest.   Self Love that is.  Doing something every day that filled my Love Bucket. 

The intention being to reset my oxytocin levels to a place where Love becomes an easy way of life. 

For a brief moment I surprised myself with a fleeting thought: What can I do that I love?   That was a very brief thought but I noticed it.

I'm delighted to say that after a...

Working in a hospital setting for many years gave me an opportunity to learn from people nearing the end of their time on earth.

I heard lots of regrets:

I wish I spent less time at work; more time with my family

I wish I worried less about money and more about creating memories

I wish I'd had the courage to follow my dreams;  take that overseas trip

If I had my time again I would have married my love;  bought that property; breathe more and relax

I wish I'd listened to my heart and been less scared of what others would think of me

And I heard lots of things people were grateful for:

I'm so glad I had time with my children when they were young;  that I put them first rather than my career

I had those overseas trips while I could

That I have those memories with my children

That I listened to what I wanted rather than what my family wanted for me

That I followed my passion to learn

I was really grateful to the people I worked with who shared these realisations. I...